Movie Review: Nope

 

A long time ago, I watched Jordan Peele's first movie, Get Out, while on a long-haul flight. My criteria for long-haul flight movie choices all revolve around things like 'light and fluffy', 'can sleep for a chunk and not miss anything', 'can be bored and fall asleep' ... so I'm not sure what possessed me to choose Get Out because, while it fulfilled none of the above, it was gripping cinema (even on the teeny-tiny screen).

Somehow I missed Us so when I saw that there was a new film I made sure I entered more one competition to win tickets. And that is how I ended up at the Adelaide launch, with a friend, also a Peele (or should that be Get Out?) fan.

I went in knowing nothing about the film and my friend commented that she'd watched the trailer before leaving home and had been left none the wiser. And, after 2 hours and 15 minutes of cinema ... well, hell, I couldn't really tell you what the film was about. I have since heard a pithy description of it (thanks reddit) but I don't want to share that here for risk of ruining things.

Because I'm somewhat bemused by the film, it means I'm also not sure what might constitute a spoiler. I'm going to try to avoid spoilers but ... you never know.

So - we're in the California desert training horses to be on movie sets. The patriarch of the family business is killed by objects falling, mysteriously, from the sky. The serious but slightly awkward son, OJ, (Daniel Kaluuya, who you'll recognise from Get Out) is left in charge of the business alongside his feckless sister, Emerald (Keke Palmer). Without his father holding things together, the business starts to go out south and it transpires that OJ is selling his best horses to their neighbour, Ricky Park. Park owns a western themed theme park, which also seems to be suffering business woes. It appears Park's finances are being held together by his connection to a children's program in the late 90s (I'm not sure how important this is to the story ... so ... abundance of caution and all that).

But then ... things take a turn south as weird stuff starts to happen. Emerald and OJ attempt to set up surveillance but the 'weird stuff' that happens disrupts anything electrical. 

Eventually, they arrive at the conclusion that the 'weird stuff' is alien. Whether or not it's a UFO or an alien, or indeed whether or not it's a sentient UFO ... well, um, yeah. But another key realisation is that the 'weird stuff' will only get you if you look at it.

Armed with this knowledge, the siblings (along with some help) come up with a plan to capture footage of said 'weird stuff'.

They do. The end.

Hm. Well, that's underwhelming. But to add to the general feeling of 'WTAF' that I left the cinema with, we've got a very strange story arc about a chimp, we've got the whole thing to do with the horses and the very first moving imagery, we've got the theme park. 

Basically, I spent over two hours watching a film, left the cinema and basically can't really tell you what it's about.

Get Out this is not. I'm not even sure I'd describe it as diverting. But it will leave you scratching your head.

DO GO: um, if you've got time to kill ... 

AVOID: if you're expecting Get Out, or just a coherent story line

CLASSIFICATION: in Australia this is rated M. There's some violence and gore and the general insanity of the film may well leave those under say 14 or 15 a little disturbed (especially as there is NO denouement). I wouldn't take my 11 year old, for what that's worth!

RATING: I have no idea. I don't feel it's fair to rate a film when I'm so bamboozled by it. 

(I saw this movie thanks to tickets I won to a preview screening. Thanks to Pedestrian - again! - for the competition). 

Movie Review: Bullet Train

 

Well, by now you've probably read more than one dismissive review of Brad Pitt's new movie, Bullet Train. In fact, if you read the Guardian you'll have read two reviews - both scoring it an identical 2/5 stars.

And golly - aren't some people a bit grumpy? Now - straight up - this movie is blood, blood, more blood. Then some blood. All on a train. The end. 

But, oddly, this doesn't make it an un-fun movie. There are laughs along the way (I saw it at a preview so the cinema was almost full - and people other than me did, indeed, laugh), and visually (apart from all the blood, or perhaps because of it) it's pretty slick. Brad Pitt is also immensely likeable (although somewhat hapless) as Ladybug, an assassin who's re-entering the game with a simple snatch & grab job. He's plagued by what he perceives as bad luck and has drunk way too much self-help Kool-Aid (with the help of a therapist).

Ladybug is supposed to hop on the eponymous Bullet Train, nick a silver suitcase with a train sticker on the handle, and then hop off.

Unfortunately, the train he hops on is full of assassins, all with various axes to grind and with varying degrees of both competence and malice.

People die (or do they?) and the story keeps you on your toes with flashbacks and new characters popping up throughout. Fortunately, the story, while twisty-turny, is well enough explained that you don't get lost. It also means I'm going to avoid plot here for risk of spoilers.

The main characters are well developed so, even though they're mostly deeply unpleasant people (probably a common problem for assassins) you do feel for most of them. Not all. And some redeem themselves. Sort of.

Don't go into this film expecting a cinematic masterpiece that is going to make you think and re-evaluate your life choices. But - it's a film about assassins on a train, you were never going to do this, right?

DO GO: if you feel like an engaging, slightly silly film.

AVOID: if you don't like gore and there's an argument that some is gratuitous.

CLASSIFICATION: In Australia the MA15+ rating is spot on - don't take your 10 year old.

RATING: 3/5 happy faces.

(I saw this movie thanks to tickets I won to a preview screening. Thanks to Pedestrian for the competition).